Scientific Article

Understanding baby crying as a language and an attempt at self-regulation

Lisa Engelke, BA MA MA

In this article, the focus is on baby crying, which can sometimes be intense and is understood as an attempt to regulate the child. In addition, baby crying is outlined in the context of regulatory crises, in which parent-child interaction is of particular importance. Finally, reference is made to early interventions in parent counseling and baby and parent psychotherapy to show that interventions can help both babies and their caregivers to understand and alleviate moments of crisis.

Ability to self-regulate

In the first three months of a baby's life, an increased tendency to restlessness can be attributed to age-specific adaptation and maturation processes. The baby faces the challenge of getting to know and adapting to basic physical processes, such as feeding and digestion, regulating its body temperature and regulating and organizing its behavioral states.¹It is therefore very understandable that the first twelve weeks of a baby's life can be accompanied by increased whining, crying and perhaps even screaming. The baby needs time to adjust to life outside the womb. Besides the fact that crying is part of a baby's overall world language and allows him/her to communicate body states, needs and emotions to the environment and interact with it, it also helps to relieve stress.² Baby crying also has a strong stimulating character. The baby is trying to communicate and show that it needs the other person to satisfy an urgent need.

Intense baby wines

According to the literature, one in five babies whines and cries more than 'normal' in the first twelve weeks of life.^1,3Even if, according to Wessel⁴, babies who cry for more than three hours a day, at least three days a week for three weeks, are referred to as "crying babies", every baby and therefore every baby's crying is very individual. While crying phases in the first twelve weeks of a baby's life were previously often associated with so-called "three-month colic", it is now assumed that babies have much more than abdominal pain and that crying should also be understood as part of psychological processing and development processes. They are referred to as normal regulatory crises.

Normally occurring regulatory crises and early regulatory disorders

The baby is faced with specific developmental tasks, which can also lead to temporary crisis-like exacerbations and the associated increased crying, sleeping or feeding problems or even tantrums. Under certain unfavorable circumstances and influencing factors, age-typical regulatory crises can subsequently develop into early childhood regulatory disorders, which are considered extreme variants in the child's coping with age-typical crises. They exacerbate and persist in connection with existing stress factors, which is why it is possible that the child will not be able to cope with the adjustment and developmental tasks at hand and that this can lead to impairments in the child's self-regulation and the parent-child relationship.^1,5

Symptom triad of early childhood regulatory disorders according to Papoušek et al. (2004) ⁶

This means that early childhood regulatory disorders are not just a disorder of the baby, but a symptom triad of child behavioral problems, severe current or chronic excessive demands on the parents and stressful factors in the parent-child relationship and interaction (in the affected regulatory areas). This can negatively influence or even threaten the relationship between the child and its parents and thus the child's further development. In the worst case, dysregulated child behavior, difficulties with affect and self-regulation and an increased risk of maltreatment can result in babies who cry excessively and parents who feel overwhelmed, desperate and above all helpless.

Clinical studies indicate that babies who cry excessively and are difficult to soothe are in many cases highly stressed by psychosocial risk factors both pre- and postnatally.¹ Prolonged stress and intense anxiety during pregnancy, unresolved couple conflicts or conflicts within the family, events such as serious illnesses, deaths, unexpected prenatal diagnostic results, previous miscarriages, as well as stressful experiences and complications during and after birth (separation of parents and child), pre- and postnatal depression in mothers and fathers are understood to be associated with increased crying in babies.

Therapeutic interventions

Thomas Harms, a very experienced German baby therapist, works intensively with babies who cry excessively. He writes that babies communicate overwhelming experiences during pregnancy, birth and/or the early days afterwards through intense crying, known as memory crying.^7,2 With the help of baby therapy interventions, the baby is enabled to 'tell its story'. Through the use of specific body and trauma psychotherapeutic interventions, the baby is supported in emotionally processing its traumatic events so that it is not repeatedly trapped in crying cycles by reminiscent stimuli. Harms² describes another possibility as to why babies cannot be soothed in the context of resonance crying. The insatiable crying of babies reflects the emotional and physical states of displeasure and tension of their caregivers. Here too, psychotherapeutic interventions can help parents to become aware of their distressing feelings and, in the best case, to integrate their own feelings and experiences, which in turn relieves the babies. Unpleasant feelings, such as shame and offense, as well as the individual effects of traumatic experiences often prevent parents from seeking support. Experts can make an important contribution to helping affected babies and their parents to get help in crisis situations and make use of counseling or therapy services.

Conclusion

Parental counseling and psychotherapy can therefore be very relieving and allow parents who constantly offer their babies co-regulatory support a space for their own feelings. After all, parents also go through processes of change and adaptation in their role as parents and as a couple, which are challenging and also require time. Furthermore, as already mentioned, in a counseling context, parents can work out ways to offer reassurance and relief to both their baby and themselves.

Published 07/2024

Lisa Engelke, BA MA MA

Psychotherapist

Lisa Engelke, BA MA MA born 1991 in Rum near Innsbruck (Tyrol/Austria) studied educational science at the University of Vienna. She completed a postgraduate psychotherapeutic specialization at the University of Vienna (specializing in individual psychology). Her professional focus is on infant, child and adolescent psychotherapy with accompanying parental work and, in particular, work with children and adolescents from foster and adoptive families. There is a specialization in the area of animal therapy interventions. In the scientific field, the focus is on developmental psychology, psychoanalysis, educational counseling and educational research.

List of sources

1 Cierpka, M. (2012): Early childhood 0-3. Counseling and psychotherapy for parents with infants and toddlers. Springer-Verlag: Heidelberg.

2 Harms, T. (2021): Don't be afraid of baby tears. How to accompany your baby's crying safely through mindfulness. Psychosozial-Verlag: Giessen. 3rd edition.

3 Sonn-Rankl, C. (2021): How to calm my baby. Patmos-Verlag: Ostfildern.14th edition.

4 Wessel et al (1954): Paroxysmal fussing in infancy, sometimes called "colic". In: Pediatrics, 14, 421-435.

5 Papoušek, M. (1985): Observations on the triggering of crying episodes in early infancy. In: Offprint from Sozialpädiatrie in Praxis und Klinik, 6:9, 517-526.

6 Papoušek, M. (2004): Regulatory disorders in early childhood. Family physician counseling for crying, sleeping and feeding disorders? In: MMW Fortschritte der Medizin, 147, 12:4, 32-38.

7 Harms, T. (2016): Emotional first aid. Attachment support - crisis intervention - parent-baby therapy. Psychosozial-Verlag: Giessen. 2nd edition.